Today I came across a very phallic cereal, and decided last minute that my son, may not appreciate Crotch Krispies for breakfast.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Dick Cereal
Today I came across a very phallic cereal, and decided last minute that my son, may not appreciate Crotch Krispies for breakfast.
Why can't I just be sick...
Im sick! I hate being sick! Im not talking a 24 hour throw up sick, where I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Im talking stuffy head, sneezing, runny nose, yucky, icky sick!
Apparently everyone in my town is also sick. I know this because decent cold medicine and cough drops are super scarce! (As were the good kleenex)
When Im sick, I dont want to mess with the public at all, if they had a delivery OTC medicine place in my city, I would use them. My beef with being sick in public is partly because I dont want to make other people as miserable as I am, and partly because my tolerance for stupid people is at an all time low when Im sick. Oh, and things that normally just annoy me, totally gross me out.
Tonight at the store, I saw a pudgy woman with shorts so short, I am about 90 percent sure I could see her ovaries, this is not ok. This is not even ok if you are skinny! This may have made me throw up in my mouth a little bit.
But, I digress! Medicine...where was I? Oh so, apparently if you have a cold, the pharmacy automatically thinks you are faking! Yes lady, I cant breathe, one nostril is stuffed up, the other running off my face, I cant breathe, or hear, and I just want to stab myself in the forehead with a fork. Don't get it twisted though, I dont have a head cold, or even a nasty sinus infection. I just put on my sick suit, so that you wouldnt suspect me of making meth in my basement.
Im home now, after presenting my license and having my background checked in the surrounding counties, I was able to pinky promise by signing an "I promise not to make meth agreement." For all my trouble I was allowed to purchase a box of Aleve Cold and Sinus from the pharmacy.
Oh and a quick note to anyone who might be reading: If you wish to purchase Cepacol throat lozenges, its quicker if you dont self check. Apparently these are a "restricted item." This means, that you have to wait for the cashier to come over and grant you permission to have and treat a sore throat.
Apparently everyone in my town is also sick. I know this because decent cold medicine and cough drops are super scarce! (As were the good kleenex)
When Im sick, I dont want to mess with the public at all, if they had a delivery OTC medicine place in my city, I would use them. My beef with being sick in public is partly because I dont want to make other people as miserable as I am, and partly because my tolerance for stupid people is at an all time low when Im sick. Oh, and things that normally just annoy me, totally gross me out.
Tonight at the store, I saw a pudgy woman with shorts so short, I am about 90 percent sure I could see her ovaries, this is not ok. This is not even ok if you are skinny! This may have made me throw up in my mouth a little bit.
But, I digress! Medicine...where was I? Oh so, apparently if you have a cold, the pharmacy automatically thinks you are faking! Yes lady, I cant breathe, one nostril is stuffed up, the other running off my face, I cant breathe, or hear, and I just want to stab myself in the forehead with a fork. Don't get it twisted though, I dont have a head cold, or even a nasty sinus infection. I just put on my sick suit, so that you wouldnt suspect me of making meth in my basement.
Im home now, after presenting my license and having my background checked in the surrounding counties, I was able to pinky promise by signing an "I promise not to make meth agreement." For all my trouble I was allowed to purchase a box of Aleve Cold and Sinus from the pharmacy.
Oh and a quick note to anyone who might be reading: If you wish to purchase Cepacol throat lozenges, its quicker if you dont self check. Apparently these are a "restricted item." This means, that you have to wait for the cashier to come over and grant you permission to have and treat a sore throat.
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